This is a rant, if you don’t want to know then don’t bother reading. I am tired, sore, and fed up. I think back and remember things I proclaimed as my truths. Things I set my heart on, things I deemed as my beliefs. I once said I would die for the things I believe. Yet here I am years later and if I am honest with myself I should have died long ago if I stuck to my convictions. I bend, I overlook, I allow that which makes my blood boil to infect my life. This is my disavowal, my proclamation to myself to no longer associate with the poison surrounding me.
I reject those who make a fortune off of my hard work while I am left to fend for myself. I have a standard to keep, both personal and professional. I do not create crap and I’m sorry you do. I no longer accept people taking from me, using me, lining their pockets with my hours and hours of frustration and creativity, leaving me with nothing so much as a thank you. No longer will I “give away” my life’s work for free to those who only exploit it.
I reject those who take and steal from me in all aspects; emotionally, mentally, physically, and creatively. I don’t need leeches sucking the blood from my body. I hardly have enough blood pumping in my veins to sustain as is. I am not your boyfriend, I am not your buddy, I am not your friend, I am not your pal. I don’t need you to exploit me, my good nature, or my heart that rests firmly on my sleeve. I apreciate that you apreciate me, I am honored but there is a line, there is an etiquette, and there is an amount of respect that needs to be upheld. I am not a civil service job, you don’t come and go as you please. If you are my friend then be a fucking friend. If you aren’t… get lost. Don’t show up with your hand out and expect anything from me. Take, take, take. Try giving.
I reject those who do not apreciate me, more so those who front like they do. I am not a fucking country club that is open to you when you are in the mood. I don’t fix things when they go wrong for you to make the same mistakes again. Learn or fail, there is no other option. I am a human being with feelings, as much as I may not show them my heart beats just like yours. Cut my skin and I will bleed. Also, I am not a brothel, I’m not here to help you get laid. I don’t care who did what and I care less about why it happened. Finally, I do not belong to you. I don’t need to report to you where I’ve been, what I’ve been doing, and why. Don’t ask in any soft of negative way. You don’t own me.
I reject the jackals. I will not give my heart to a girl who does not know how to keep it. I am not a child anymore and I refuse to love a child. I don’t need my heart stepped on, I don’t need to be lied to. I am not here to buy you shit, I am not here to compete with your current boyfriend who sucks. If you want me, leave him, and I don’t mean cheat on him with me. I’m not going to convince you, if you feel it then get into it, otherwise stay with your boyfriend and have a good ‘ol time. I am not going to buy your love. So no matter what you heard I was about in the past keep your application because I’m not into people like you. I am done chasing. I’ve dated the best and the worst, you ain’t shit. Get over yourself. No hussies either, thanks.
I reject those who do not respect themselves. What is wrong with you? Why do you continue to sink into shit? Are you so unhappy? Are you so insecure? What happened to you? Another boyfriend, another girlfriend, another waste of time. Addicted to a monotonous lifestyle. Why can’t you hold out for something special. Try reaching for the stars. Nope, right off the rip, dick out, or legs spread, trying to find that prime you once lived. It’s gone. And with every new venture you lose sight of yourself, who you are and who you were. Why can’t you have some respect for yourself and stand for something. I reject watching you fall for everything. I reject knowing you have disgraced your name. I’d rather live alone forever than live one day as you. I’d rather die on my feet than live on my knees.
Signed sincerely,
/Jay
I just had to come on and post a picture of the new Nike joints I picked up. They arrive later this week and I’m psyched on that. Dunk Low “Thought Bubbles”. The insole has some people walking around with thought bubbles coming off their heads. I guess beyond that I’m into these cause I don’t have a lot of yellow in my shoe collection. Come to think of it I don’t have any yellow joints.
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